Pam accepts Alan's offer

“I g-guess I don’t have a choice, but-“

“Great!” Alan immediately pressed a button on his desk phone and said, “Sara, can I see you in my office?”

A few moments later, Sara entered the room. “What’s up?”

“We’re going to have to find Ms. Weedle a new drawer somewhere where her smell won’t bother any of my other employees,” Alan explained enthusiastically. “I’m thinking she can have one of the empty filing cabinet drawers in the archive room. So how about you carry her over there and file her away. Just make sure to label her drawer.”

Sara looked down at Pam and smirked. This is so humiliating, Pam thought. Everyone thinks I’m some kind of joke! I thought Sara was my friend!

“You know,” Sara proposed, “I bet if we keep her in a glass jar, that’ll cut down on the smell.”

Alan’s eyes lit up. “Fantastic idea! Tell you what, why don’t you take her out of here and find her a jar. If you can’t smell her in the jar, bring her back to my office. I’d rather store her in here.”

“Sure thing, Mr. B,” Sara replied, scooping up Pam’s plate and walking out of the room.

“Sara! You’ve got to get me out of here!” Pam exclaimed, trying desperately to ignore how good it felt to be jiggled as Sara carried her away. “Alan’s not going to transform me back into a woman; he’s going to keep me like this forever so I’ll work for free, and if I refuse, he’ll flush me down the toilet! You need to take me home and find a way to help me!”

Sara arrived in the break room, and set down Pam and her plate on the counter. She looked down at Pam with pity in her eyes but a smile on her lips and said, “Sorry, Pam, but if that’s the way he wants it, that’s the way it’s going to be. I mean, come on, I’m not going to lose my job just because you turned yourself into a hotdog. That wouldn’t be fair, would it?” Sara rummaged through one of the cabinets until she found a nearly empty jar of jam.

As Sara rinsed the jar in the sink, Pam sank into despair. They can’t really be serious about this, Pam tried to reassure herself. This is just another office prank. Alan wouldn’t really do this to me. Would he?

After Sara had finished cleaning out the jar, she picked up Pam’s plate and tipped her into the jar, scrunching her face up with revulsion as she watched Pam ooze off the plate and land in the jar with a disgusting splat. “Eww! You’re so gross, Pam,” Sara exclaimed, giggling. As the lid got screwed onto Pam’s new jar, the sounds from the outside world became muffled. She watched helplessly as Sara sniffed at the air a few times and then hurried back to Alan’s office.

As Sara ran, Pam got tossed around in the jar, plopping off of the walls. I don’t think my life could possibly get more humiliating, Pam thought. I’m a poo in a jar!

“Well?” Sara asked Alan, thrusting out Pam-in-a-jar for his olfactory inspection. As the jar got thrust towards Alan’s face, Pam was catapulted forward into the front face of the jar, splattering against it and gasping with ecstasy. Alan sniffed at her.

“Perfect, I can’t smell her at all! That’ll be all, Sara,” he said, snatching Pam out of her hands. After Sara had left, he rolled his chair to the corner of his office and opened the bottom drawer on one of his cabinets. “This will be your new home, Pam,” he said as he lowered her jar into her drawer. “Remember, I own you now. If you ever stop giving me good ideas, I’ll just flush you down the toilet and forget about you. No one will miss a turd.”

Jiggling with terror, the tiny, helpless poop watched the last sliver of light get snuffed out as Alan slammed her drawer shut and moved on with his day.

THE END